Footy!

Ahh, what a fine day; the sun was shining, the kids were laughing, the hangover was nt so bad... and I played footy! It's been a while since I played footy properly, hence I was crap! Usually, what I lack in talent, I make up for in enthusiasm... however, a karaoke-until-5am induced hangover robbed me of my enthusiasm too!!

Never mind.

Met lots of friendly new folk though. Damned if I can remember there names, think there was a Miho, a Dan, a Norio, a Marco, a Miki, a Maki, a Louis, a Yuko..? Pretty international, even a couple of Argentinians thrown into the mix. And of course everyone could speak Japanese - except me! But they were nice enough to tell me my Japanese is good, bless 'em!

Mixed footy is a wee bit scary though, especially when you're shit at footy and there's a big Argentinian guy running at you! But I did manage to get my fair share of dirty tackles in there (my speciality), and floored one guy (he was skinny). Hmm, must practice...

But all is not lost, my post-footy down-the-pub skills are top-notch!

What's the opposite of 'green fingers'?

'Black fingers'?

'Fingers of death'?

'The plague'?

Or perhaps, 'Too-damn-lazy-to-chuck-the-occassional-glass-of-water-into-the-plant-pot', will suffice?

I killed me plant. In case you hadn't picked up on that. Well, it's not quite dead, seems to be clinging onto the last cold dregs of life. See, I don't take care of the poor thing, but I do like to have a wee bit of greenery in the room. Adds life. But me room is barely big enough to swing a hamster in, hence me and the plant have occassional collisions. Today we had a full on war. The cheeky bugger attacked me on the way to the bathroom (I was on the way to the bathroom, not the plant, in case you were confused), so I retaliated, and now he's looking severely droopy. More so than usual. Poor thing.

Anyone have any quick-fix solutions for houseplants in distress? I was thinking a wee shot of that sake I've had since God was a lad might sort him out...?

Bless 'er little cotton bobbin socks!

Me mum's comming to visit! Ain't that nice? She's finally decided to get her little butt on a little plain and haul ass from little old England to crazy old Japan. And it only took several guilt-laden phone calls, letters and e-mails... guilt is a powerful tool!

Got herself a bargain too, flying from rainy Manchester to rainy Paris, then on to rainy Tokyo for the bargain price of £500. Perhaps then, me lovely mum can spend a few pennies on the lovely moi?!? Tokyo's a difficult city to live in when you're a poor humble English teacher like me!

But it seems my mum's semse of adventure has ebbed away with age (not sure if her sense of adventure ever stretched far beyond the hot pants of the 60's...), for she dared not travel alone. She'll be dragging along her wee buddy. Hence it'll be me and a couple of old birds taking on Toyko this Christmas. Old birds - I jest! Fighting fit and in their fifties, I'm sure we can show those wee teeny-boppers in Shibuya a thing or two... (anyone care to make a wager?). Three ladies in a teeny-weeny apartment - will there be tantrums and tears over the hairdryer? Maybe not, but I'm sure me mother will protest over me watching TV whilst listening to music and pouring over the net. It's an odd new habit I've developed. I like electricity.

So, we'll be off to Kyoto. Me mum wants to see a Geisha. Hard to find these days me thinks, but one shall endeavour to do ones best! And if we cannot find, then we shall become! You can pay rediculous amounts of money to be dressed and made-up like a Geisha. Splendid. I wanna do Kobe too, apparently they have fantastic illuminations at Christmas time (probs something to do with the fact that bloomin' western foreigners took over the wee port town way back when). Let's hope these ladies have no probs doing three or four cities in 10 days... And let's hope my purse strings will stretch a little (credit card, credit card, credit card...!!).

Then there's the karaoke and booze, maybe a dash of Roppongi, a bit of NY Eve craziness, and - of course - sushi!

Ah, it'll be a Merry Ol' Christmas!

A python?

Now, why would anyone buy a python? They ain't pretty, they ain't exactly easy to look after, and they'll probably have your 'ead if you give 'em a chance!

A dog you can walk in the park. A cat will sleep on your lap. But a snake?

C-chan, your bloke's a nutter!

Baby mice in the freezer - mind you don't confuse 'em with the bread buns!

Kabuki part 2

Yo, Kitty-Cat, this one's for you!

I went to see Kabuki - again. I'd decided that once was enough, but I was cunningly tricked by my friends into seeing it again. The little monkeys lured me to Ginza with the promise of beer and cheap food courtesy of Pete's student's parent's - they own an izakaya in Ginza.

After a wee wander around the Gin, we find ourselves outside Kabuki-za.

"What are we doing here?", I enquire.

"Oh, my sister is queuing for tickets", replies Pete's student, Koichi.

"We're going to see Kabuki?"

"Didn't Pete mention it?", says Karli. Pete chuckles. So, off we go to fight for the cheap seats at the back.

It lasted an hour. An hour! A whole hour squished into one of those teeny little seats. However, it was actually not that bad. Better than the last one. I even chuckled once. And I only closed my eyes a couple of times...

+

'Higgledy piggledy'. There's another one.

Anyone know the correct spelling for that?!

Cat says...

... 'sausage'.

She says it's a funny word, makes her laugh.

'Knickers' makes me laugh, 'plonker' too.

Some words, however, make me cry. Par example, 'atatakakunakata' (=it was not warm) - 'cos I can't bloody say it!!

What tickles you?